iamsosorry

Picked up a card for Chicago FlyBoards rental & sales because I’m always looking for new ways combine my three great passions:
1. Spending money
2. Risking great bodily harm
3. Looking like a grade-A blowhole. (at Water Tower Park)

This pimp is on the down low

Oh this is my stop.

So much of it is not cute, LEAST of all his refusal to part with his goatee.

Very LGBT. Totally.

I’m a good guesser

<3

Other musicians who’ve gained my mother’s seal of approval through the years:
• Rihanna: “Andrew, there’s a girl named Rihanna on the Today Show. Have you SEEN Rihanna? She’s very pretty.”
• Billy Corgan: “He was on The Early Show. Very unique. Very unique sound.” (Morning Talk show performances were the main source of pop culture exposure in our house.)
• Lady Antebellum: “I wish they didn’t say ‘I’m a little drunk’ in that song.”
• Destiny’s Child: “Nice Christian Girls.”
• Missy Elliot (But ONLY the edited version of “Get Ur Freak On” that I had on my Totally Hits 2003 CD.)

Love you, mom.

BREAKING:
WOMAN FEELS OK ABOUT BODY
Just o.k.

KIM K’S MET GALA DRESS AS ULTIMATE PUNK ACT (“What is a faux hawk?”)

KIM K’S MET GALA DRESS AS FUCK YOU TO PAPZ CONSTANTLY TALKING ABOUT HER BODY (“I would wear a hood and mask to dinner if it were feasible.”)

KIM K’S MET GALA DRESS AS ACT OF RADICAL BODY POSITIVITY (“What do you mean ‘How will I lose my baby weight?’ No more questions.”)